reminds me of
au where abel or the grey family owns a store or something andstuffjustteenage toma hanging around the storeand flirting with abel who tries to ignore her as he serves customershe catches her shoplifting and is hella pissedand tells her to never come by againimmigrant criminaland she just lurks and smirks and wears revealing clothing and they bang
reminds me of

bfankhauser:

so this guy with a premature ejaculation problem comes out of nowhere

shit toma saysisaac would try so hard not to laughjo would be like :o toma pls!and abel would almost immediately bark out such an amused laughjustthe second the last word was out of her mouthHAH! hahahah!JUST SO DELIGHTED BY HIS DUMB WIFE
So a dog walks into the forest and he sees a whale and says “aren’t you supposed to be in the ocean?” and the whale says “Yes.

A joke told by the Russian exchange student that used to go to my school (via wickedpedia)
shit toma says

conspicuouslad:

I read every one of these to my wife until she screamed at me to shut up.

reminds me ofI CAN'T TELL IF THIS IS SHIT ABEL WOULD READ OUT TO TOMAMAKING HER MORE AND MORE FRUSTRATEDOR JOKES SHE WOULD TELL THAT MAKE HIM CRACK THE FUCK UPEITHER WAYTHESE ASSHOLESTHESE DORKY ASSHOLES

sleeplessnightsofthinking:

excessgoldenparachutepayments:

??????

Ok I need to find this card and get it for everyone I love.

remind me ofshit toma saysshe would buy this card for abelqueue

ptrparker:

phil-of-the-phuture:

ptrparker:

why can’t you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom?

*sighs* because the ‘pee’ is silent

no because it’s dead

shit toma says

tonedbellyplease:

I’ve reblogged this before but it’s just too precious

abbeyspawn: sofia utkingenderswap auidr how we tag anythingreminds me of
reminds me oflola
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